Third Trimester

When I think back to February when we found out that we were pregnant, the third trimester seemed like it was ages away ..... now, here we are! Praise the Lord, we made it!!! We are now 28 weeks pregnant and if something were to happen at this point, the chances of baby boy surviving are so much higher. Our next milestone is 32 weeks- I am guessing with as busy as we have been, the next 4 weeks will fly by and 32 will be here before we know it. Or at least I can hope so, right?

We had our last cervical ultrasound yesterday and everything looked great. My cervix was measuring the same it was at 24 weeks. Dr G actually said to not be surprised if it had shortened a little due to the natural flow of things, but nope- it was the same! We also got our last peek at baby boy. Unfortunately, we were at the OB this time so the quality of the ultrasound was not quite what we were spoiled with at the MFM. No 4D pics for us anymore and the ones we did get are hard to decipher. But, I will say that we got a good look at baby boy's head and he has a ton of hair already!!!! My guess is he is going to come out with a full head of brown hair just like his daddy!

(I tried to download the cutest pic of J when he was just born, but am having technical difficulties!)

We have been so busy lately that I went a whole month without a belly pic! The quote of the week from everyone has been, "wow, you have popped!" Yes, I definitely have popped. I seriously woke up one day last week and looked down with amazement at how much I grew overnight! I am still feeling great though and have absolutely no complaints.



And, finally what you all have been badgering me for..... name game clue # 5

Neither the first name or the middle name are biblical....

our day in pictures...

The day was so special that I think the pictures really say it all. A very special thanks to Butterflies and Prayers for the donation of a dozen monarch butterflies for this occasion. Please check out this fabulous charity and see what amazing things they are doing for those that have lost loved ones butterfliesandprayers.

Creations by Marcia made us this fabulous cookie "cake" to honor the girls. I want to always make sure this day is special and I felt a cake was not quite appropriate- this cookie was perfect and tasted fabulous as well! (thanks to Kellie for the idea)

And, finally a huge thank you to our parents and friends who left flowers and cards at the grave site. I can hardly put into words how much it means to us to know that you have not forgotten and that our girls short lives made an impact on your lives. I am forever grateful to you all for your love and support.

Alexcyn Grace

A year ago today we said goodbye to our second daughter, our dear Alexcyn Grace.


We woke up that morning with so much hope for you. It was quickly ripped out from underneath us as we spoke to the doctors and heard the words we dreaded to hear- you were not doing well. We had only been parents for 3 days and we were suddenly faced with the worst decision a parent ever has to make....to hold on to you or to let you go. It didn't take us long to make that difficult decision. We wanted what was best for you and we couldn't live with ourselves knowing that we selfishly put you through pain and suffering just so we could keep holding your hand. A short time later, your numbers started going down and we thought we might lose you. I was so scared, but you pulled through. It was then that I knew you were simply letting us know that it was ok, you were ready to go to Heaven.

That afternoon you were baptised by Pastor Frank as you were wrapped in the beautiful white blanket that your great grandma B made for you. (I still sleep with that blanket to this day and I swear it still smells like you.) Early that evening, your grandpa P flew in from Cali so he could meet his second granddaughter.

A short time later, we held you in our arms for the first time since you were born. It was such a bittersweet moment for us. Holding you in our arms meant that you were also leaving us soon to go to the arms of the Lord. Those moments with you; holding your hand, tickling your feet, and kissing your sweet face will forever be etched in our hearts.

We love you, we miss you, we will never forget you.

We will hold your hand your hand forever...

July 18

A year ago today our dream of becoming parents became a reality.

A year ago today we held Brooke, our first born child in our arms.

A year ago today we said goodbye to our precious Brooke as she said hello to her new life in Heaven.

A year ago today we held the hand of our precious Alexcyn as she fought so hard to stay on this earth.

Today we remember how beautiful our baby girls Brooke and Alexcyn were.

Today we remember the overwhelming feeling of love we had for our girls the minute we saw them.

Today we remember that moments can be a lifetime.

Today we remember that our plans were not Gods plans.

Today we remember....

Brooke and Alexcyn,

Your short lives have impacted us forever and not a day goes by that we don't think of you. We tell your baby brother about you and how beautiful you were and how you are looking down from Heaven protecting him. We wish we were celebrating with you today and watching you attempt to eat your first birthday cake. We will never forget you or this day of your birth- the day we finally became parents.

Mommy and Daddy

Brooke Janae, July 18, 2008 - July 18, 2008

Alexcyn Grace, July 18, 2008- July 21, 2008

Precious Angels, May You Rest In The Arms Of The Lord Until We Meet Again

A year ago today...

A year ago I was innocent. I was naive. I was ignorant. I woke up to a beautiful sunny day at home and went to sleep pumped full of magnesium sulfate laying in a hospital bed. Never in a million years did I imagine the life changing events that would happen to J and I over the next few days.

A year later I am no longer innocent, naive or ignorant. I no longer take things for granted. I no longer think that just because you are pregnant and past your first trimester that you are safe. I have learned the difficult lesson that just because you say your prayers at night, that does not guarantee a life without heartache.

I now have a tiny hole in my heart where a year ago it was full of so much love and hope. I look back on the last year and all that has happened since that day in July when my water broke and our lives took a path that neither of us ever imagined. I say it over and over again, but I just can't believe it has been a year. There were times of extreme love, heartache, despair, fear, etc... but we are happy to say that we have survived. The first year is always the hardest due to all the firsts that you have to go through. We are hopeful that once Tuesday passes we will be able to take a deep breath and praise God for helping us survive that first year! We also want to thank all of you out there that are always covering us with prayer, support and encouragement. We couldn't have made it without you!

This Saturday, J and I will be honoring the girls 1st birthday by releasing a dozen butterflies at their grave site. I am thrilled that I have found a beautiful way to honor their beautiful lives. We will also be remembering that we said goodbye to our sweet Brooke on this day. And then, on July 21 it will have been a year since we said goodbye to our precious Alexcyn. These will be difficult days for us and for our families and friends as the memories come rushing back. Please continue to surround us with prayers of peace during the next few days as we remember.

You, the God of all grace, who called me to Your eternal glory in Christ, after I have suffered a little while will Yourself restore me and make me strong, firm and steadfast 1 Peter 5:10

This week...

I can't believe that this week is finally here. I am trying to stay very positive for this little boy growing inside me, but I just miss Brooke and Alexcyn so much right now. And I know it is only going to get worse as Saturday approaches. I am not sure what we are going to do on Saturday. I have a few things I am working on but not sure if they are going to work out or not. I do realize that we are not the only ones that are missing the girls this week and I wanted to give you all a chance to leave them a little birthday message if you want. Feel free to leave a comment in this post or email me at kschrtnbr@yahoo.com with the subject Message so I know you are not spam. I plan to take any messages to the cemetery on Saturday so that the girls can look down on their birthday and know how much they were loved!

Misc happenings....

I just got back from another appt with my OB. She was thrilled that they officially released me from the MFM because she said that "was such a good sign". Everything was fine today- baby boys heartbeat was 162! It was a little high because he was pumped up on lots of sugar. I had to do my glucose test for gestational diabetes and had to drink that fantastic orange drink. I have to say that it really wasn't as horrendous as others have made it sound- I chilled it for about a week though so maybe that helped! I passed with "flying colors" according to Dr G so I can now go back to eating all the sweets that I am craving this pregnancy. I go back to see her in two weeks and then in three we get our final cervical ultrasound.

As for me, I am doing well. This month has been a little difficult for me emotionally just knowing that it was a year ago when.... So far, 3 of the babies that were due in July have been born already. Praise the Lord that baby E came a little early just to save his "aunt" K a trip to the hospital on July 18! We have 2 more babies to go this month and one in August and then I think we are done until it is our turn!

I bit the bullet last night and ordered our baby bedding. It was difficult for me to press the order button because I am doing a custom fabric that is non-refundable. I am finally gaining confidence in this pregnancy, but I still keep all my receipts just in case things need to be returned. I also ordered a customized onesie from Etsy for baby boys birth announcement. I love it and can't wait to show him off in this, but it is a surprise so you will have to wait until October!

As for the stroller debate, I think I am just going to register for 3 and call it good! I have realized that I am totally over analyzing it and making it way more intense than it needs to be! But, it has also been a good distraction so I think the obsession is ok for now!

And, finally what you all have been waiting so patiently for........

Name Game Clue #4- If you tune in to one of the bottom shows (4-8) listed in my Crazy Eights post, you will hear this name. Listen carefully though, it is not necessarily one of the main characters!