12 to 13

The boys and I have been enjoying some down time at my parents house in IN for the last few days.  It has been wonderful to take some time to relax a bit and enjoy some quality time with the grandparents.  Jason joined us here for our exciting NYE celebration at home.  Ashton went to bed at 7 and Grant made it to 11 before he asked to go to sleep! I about passed out standing up at 12:30.  Our NYE celebrating has definitely changed over the years, but I wouldn't have it any other way!  Here is my annual summary of our year in pictures...

January

 Ashton got baptized

February

Grant's first time on skis!

March

 enjoying the unseasonably warm temps with hike through our property

April

  my two easter bunnies

 May

We packed up and moved out of our house... and YES, I did keep these meds.  They are resting comfortably in the drawer in our fridge until I can let go. 

  Tulip Time

 June

Swimming lessons for Grant 

 and my favorite pic of these two beautiful boys!

July

honored Brooke and Alexcyn on their 4th birthday

August

Annual trip to the cottage with J's family

September

Fabulous family trip to the zoo

October

Grant turns 3

Ashton turns 1

Our little dalmatians on Halloween

November

in everything we give thanks...

December

 It finally snowed!!!

 Ashton was a pro at opening presents this year

he must have learned from Grant! 

2012

2012 was definitely a year of change for us.  We sold our house of 10 years and moved into a family rental home.  Having our future be so up in the air is something I have to pray for daily because I am a planner that likes to have all my ducks in a row!

I still struggle with comparing myself to others- especially as I long for our dream home.  At this point, I unfortunately think this will always be something I struggle with.  If anyone has a devotional that they would recommend on this subject, please let me know!

I took a photography class in the fall.  It happened to be a really busy time in our lives so I don't feel that I got as much out of it as I should have, but I did learn a few basics.  I will however not be a professional photographer anytime soon, but at least I know what my camera is capable of when it is not on AUTO.

I finally got a chance to sing in a choir at church- something I had wanted to do for a long time.

I bought a sewing machine with some birthday money and made curtains for our house.  My goal for 2013 is to learn how to sew something other than a straight line.

We went to the zoo, the park, the farmers market every Wednesday morning, the splash pad, we played in the fallen leaves and had our first snowball fight last week.


2013

This year, my goal is to let go.  I need to let go of comparing myself to others because I know I will never be that super mom that sews her own clothes while also making delicious homemade organic meals in my spotlessly clean home decorated with all of my completed pinterest projects and  full of children who never whine and always say please and thank you without being told.  All while being showered by 6 am, hair done, make up on and never wearing anything but stylish clothes (aka not comfy pants and a sweat shirt!)

I need to let go of clutter in my life.  I am a huge pack rat so this one will be tough.  I have already started going through my clothes and getting rid of stuff from like 10 years ago that I was SURE I would wear again.

This year will be 5 years since our girls were born.  I am doing fine, but I know I still need to let go of all those what ifs.  I see little girls dressed up at Christmas and I think what if my girls were here.  I see pics of the daddy daughter dance and I think what if Jason could take Brooke and Alexcyn.  I hear stories of trips to the American Girl store and I think what if I could be there to see the look of utter amazement when they walk in those doors.

I will focus on letting go of the longing I have for the new mini van, the dream house and the perfect wardrobe and instead I will talk to Grant and Ashton about being grateful that we have a roof over our head, a car in our driveway and clothes on our bodies.

After all, letting go is what being a Christian is all about, right?  Sometimes I need reminders...

Ezekiel 36:25-27
"Then I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you will be clean. Your filth will be washed away, and you will no longer worship idols. And I will give you a new heart with new and right desires, and I will put a new spirit in you. I will take out your stony heart of sin and give you a new, obedient heart'"


I pray that you all had a safe and happy new year celebration and I hope you are all blessed with your hearts desires in 2013!

Ten on Tuesday a day late...

1.  Ashton's new words....  ball, grandma, up, cracker, bye bye, caillou (this one shocked me)

2.  Grant is WAY into trains right now.  From the minute he wakes up until the minute he goes to sleep, he asks to play trains.

3.  Grant's new concern is that everyone has a chimney so Santa can come to their house.  We have to take him outside about twice a day so he can make sure ours is still there.  It is so cute!

4.  Ashton is finally getting more teeth.  For a while there I thought he might have only 4 teeth for the rest of his life!

5.  The other day Grant and I were playing trains and he looked at me and asked, "mommy do you know something about trains?"  I said, "no Grant, please tell me."  He replied," it doesn't matter where they are going, it just matters if you get on."  hmmmmm...maybe he has watched Polar Express one too many times!

6.  Ashton is quite the tantrum thrower.  When you tell him no, he throws himself on the floor with his head in his hands.  Sometimes he peeks up to see if you are actually paying attention to his fit.  It is quite the scene.

7.  Nothing like the phrase sleep in heavenly peace to get me to ball like a baby.  Thank goodness they always play that song by candlelight!

8.  I feel like I could open a toy store with all the goodies these boys got for Christmas!  We are definitely blessed.  As we prayed at night, I tried to convey to him the importance of being grateful because there are a lot of kids that don't even get presents.  Not sure if he understood, but I figure it is never too early to try to get him to be more humble!

9.  My favorite new recipe for all of our Christmas parties- Swiss Almond Dip.  Delicious!

10.  Blessing of the week:  so many things.....  tons of food on our table, a warm place to celebrate Christmas, being surrounded and blessed by family and friends, baby cuddles with our cousins little girls, watching the look on Grant's face when he got his bike, watching Ashton open his presents (yes, he actually opened them!), I could go on and on.  Just feeling very blessed this Christmas.

 

For those that are suffering, I pray for healing. 

For those that are lost, I pray for guidance.

For those that are missing loved ones, I pray for peace.

For those that are struggling, I pray for strength.

May you feel the love of God  this Christmas Day. 
 

Today we are spending the day in our jammies making the first batch of Christmas cookies.  I just love days like this!

1.  It has been a rough week.  I was heartbroken Friday when I turned the tv on to watch The Chew and saw the news of the massacre.  I grabbed my boys as the tears were streaming down my face.  I think I held them tight for 5 minutes before Ashton starting screaming.  I instantly grabbed Grant and told him that we needed to pray for these innocent children and families.  Again, one of those times I question God and his plans.

2.  On Saturday, my pop pop passed away.  He was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer a couple weeks ago and we were told he wouldn't be with us for much longer.  We are sad to say goodbye, but thankful that he didn't have to suffer with the pain of cancer for too long.  I never lived by my pop pop, but have fond memories of summers at his house in Maine.  The last time I saw him was almost 5 years ago when I was pregnant with the girls.  It breaks my heart that he never got to meet Grant and Ashton, but when I heard of his passing, I found comfort in imagining him meeting Brooke and Alexcyn and holding them in his arms in Heaven.

3.  We will be traveling to Florida in January for pop pop's memorial service.  Please, please, please share your advice for flying with a one year old that does.not.sit.still.  I really think we need a tranquilizer for him...

4. Jason and I decided that we needed to move farther north for the month of December.  This whole no snow at Christmas just isn't cutting it for our family.

5.  Finally got a chance to lay down and watch one of my all time favorite movies, Love Actually, and I fell asleep within the first 10 minutes.

6.  Grant is experiencing night terrors. Thankfully he doesn't get them every night.  The fear in his scream is so real, it brings me to tears.

7.  I hate to curse it, but Ashton has been sleeping through the night for 3 weeks now!  It only took a year...

8.  I wrapped a few gifts and put them under the tree as a test to see how long it took Ashton before he touched them.  Amazingly enough, they are still in their original position.  The tree is still getting redecorated every hour, but he seems oblivious to the presents underneath.  Thank goodness because I couldn't store any more presents in my room - I could hardly walk in there anymore!

9.  The other day I was at a stop light in front of a church.  There was a long line of people wrapping around the church and through the parking lot.  They were all holding laundry baskets.  The reality that all those people didn't know where their next meal was coming from hit me like a ton of bricks.  We are so blessed to always have food on our table and never have to wonder what to do when the food runs out.

10.  Blessing of the week:  my babies.  Just as every one else is, I am holding them tighter than ever today.

Ten on Tuesday Numbers...

1.  1567= times a day that the bottom 2 feet of our tree get redecorated by little hands.

2.  1= bottles a day for Ashton.  Woo hoo!  Now it just comes down to mommy being able to let go of that last bottle before bed. I think I'll wait until after the holidays to give up that last bit of "babyness" in my baby.

3.  14= days I got to take a shower without little hands peeking in or having screaming kids on the other side of the door. I think I could really get used to having a live in grandpa!

4.  10= amount of pictures I saw on Facebook of proud daddy's escorting their beautiful daughters to the Father Daughter Dance.

5.  10= times my heart broke for Jason knowing he will never experience that feeling with his daughters.

6. 879- times a day Grant asks us to play trains.

7.  2= letters of Ashton's first official word other than the usual momma, dada and uh oh.  UP!

8.  3= presents left to buy before Christmas.

9.  5= hours I got to spend on a much needed ladies night.  We did some shopping, ate some yummy food and enjoyed a Snickers martini to end the night.  Friends are so good for the soul!

10.  14= days that we have been blessed with Grandpa at our house.  We will miss him so much.  I didn't have the privilege of growing up by my grandparents my whole life.  Jason did.  Many times I wish that my parents lived here so that they could have the same relationship with my boys that I see Jason have with his grandparents.

Ten on Tuesday

1.  I won the lottery!  $11 worth that is.  Ha- at least the ticket is paid for!  I never play the lottery, but I was at a baby shower last weekend and somehow I managed to win all 3 games.  I figured it was a sign that I was lucky.  I would have liked to win a little more, but I will take what I can get! On another note- it is kinda awkward winning all 3 games at a baby shower...

2. Grandpa Pat is here with his Ipad.  He introduced Grant to Angry Birds the other day.  Today he came up to him and asked him if he could play Mad Chickens.  LOL!

3.  I am not a huge fan of technology.  I don't own a smart phone or an ipad and I get extremely irritated by families that I see text each other across the restaurant table.  However, yesterday I was able to watch J tee off on his dream golf vacation via the web cam at the golf course.  That is when I think technology is pretty cool.

4. Speaking of technology.... My dad and I have been having a Dawson's Creek marathon the last couple days.  I love that he has the ability to get addicted to teenage dramas with me!  Anyways, I am LMAO at how outdated the show seems now.  Joey's sister had a baby at Dawson's house because her phone wasn't working - no cell phones.  The group had detention and had to alphabetize the card catalog- the what???  Dawson and Pacey work at the video store.... I could go on and on.

5.  Anyone have a balance bike for their kids?  I am debating one for Grant but am just not sure.  Any advice?

6. Is it really Christmas?  It was 65 out again today.  Definitely not the winter wonderland that I want this time of year.  Mother Nature- I need some snow!  Not forever, just for December would be fine.

7. The toilet now has a lock on it.  Why did it take so long for you to tell me that those things existed???  I could have saved a remote control, a weather station and a set of keys.

8. I am still on the cauliflower kick...  these were not bad.  They definitely satisfied my buffalo craving, not sure the guys would like them instead of wings though.

Source: thecurvycarrot.com via Krista on Pinterest

9.  The week before Thanksgiving we had family pictures taken.  We are STILL waiting for the photographer to send us the pictures so that we can use them for our Christmas cards (she said it would only be a week). At this point I am thinking that they might not even arrive before Christmas!  This is driving me crazy...

10.  Blessing of the week: someone to clean up the puke.  Last night Ashton ate some moon sand that Grant threw on the floor and he instantly hurled all over the kitchen floor.  I was very thankful for my dad who quickly wiped it up, threw the clothes in the washer and moped the floor while I gave Ashton a bath.  It's nice to have someone around in moments like that!